Hot dogs.Zim was hard at work on his latest plan at world conquest. In the uppe rlevels, he could
hear Gir screaming insanely. He tried to ignore it.
"Maybe if I rigged all the tomatoes to attack…"
Zim clutched his head.
"AUGH! THREE INCHES of reinforced TITANIUM ALLOY
cannot keep the insanity out!"
He bolted for the elevator, determined to shut that robot off if it was the last thing he
Upstairs, he found Gir on the floor playing with what appeared to be a giant hot dog.
"GIR! Put that human
food down! NOW!"
Zim watched in horror as the 'hot dog' sprouted legs, and started running around.
THE HOT DOG HAS MUTATED!"
"Naw, master! It's a weiner dog! I NAMED HIM WILLY!"
"Yeah! The lady
at the store said it was a daksund, but she's dumb, apparently."
Zim eyes the dog, who was busy chasing
it's tail. It bore some resemblance to the 'cute' hamster. He shuddered at the recollection of that disaster.
does tricks! SIT WILLY!"
To Zim's amazement, the dog sat. Gir ran through the standard list of dog commands. The dog performed
each of them. Zim smiled, and retreated to his lab.
"But sir, don't you remember the LAST time we tried this?"
course. ZIM MAKES NO MISTAKES!"
"So, don't you think doing it AGAIN will result in similar failure?"
"NO! This time
it will work." Zim told the computer.
"You know the definition of insanity is doing the same thing, and expecting different
"Just making sure…"
"NOW! We shall begin the process of MUTATING THE WEINER!"
probably end up cleaning it up, too…" The computer said under his breath.
"What was that?"
sat straight up in bed. He had been woken up by a loud noise. And loud noises can only mean one thing.
"ZIM!" He shouted.
QUIET!" Gaz screamed from her room.
Dib jumped out of bed and looked out his window. He saw several police vehicles drive
by, but nothing else. He quickly dressed, and climbed out the window.
He followed the flashing lights into the city, where
he found a huge… weiner dog.
Destroying the city.
"Zim must really be getting desperate." He said. He spotted
the little alien riding on the back of the huge canine. Zim was laughing maniacally. Until the dog took off, running like
Between trying not to fall the 80 feet to the ground and trying to see where the dog was going, Zim was having
a hard time of it. It just got harder when he saw where the dog was headed. The Ocean. And at 200 yards a bound, he was getting
"NO! BAD DOG! SIT! SIT, WILLY!" The dog ignored him, and splashed into the water.
"NO! Go back to the shore!
Willy couldn't hear him, and kept heading deeper. Zim tried to avoid the burning water. He soon saw that he was
going to have to swim back to shore. Willy was up to his shoulders, and showed no sign of going back yet. In a awkward swan
dive, Zim leapt off the dog, and into the cold ocean water.
Dib arrived on the beach just in time to see the dog disappear
over the horizon. He hoped Zim had gone with it. It would never make it across the ocean. His hopes evaporated upon seeing
the green boy swimming desperately to shore. The paste did, and had, washed off. Tendrils of steam rose from his body as he
sprawled on the sand.
Dib laughed at his foe. Zim noticed him, and glared. He threw a huge ball of sand at him, and ran
off toward his house. Dib wiped sand off his face, and glared at the retreating alien. Then he abandoned it and began walking
Two days later.
(Translated from Chinese)
"HEY! What is that?"
"It's… It's… A WEINER DOG!" The
two boys stared at each other, screamed, and ran, screaming, for the shore.
On the beach, bathers stare wordlessly at the
"LOOK AT THE HORRIBLE AMERICAN HOT DOG!"