Sequel to Twists, READ THAT FIRST!
"Happy birthday Gaz!" Dib yelled. Gaz sat straight up in bed. Her heart went a million miles an hour.
"Me and Zim figured
since you had to spend your birthday in space…and it's our fault…We would make today your birthday." Gaz grinned
"Um, Zim's waiting downstairs. We'll meet you down there when you get dressed, OK? We made you breakfast." Downstairs
the smoke alarm blared. The others in the house soon took up the call.
"STUPID HUMAN TOASTER!"
"Ummm. Yeah. I'm gonna
go take care of that. See you in a few minutes."
Gaz came down the stairs slowly, hoping that she didn't see a smoking
charred ruin. She didn't see anything blackened, so she relaxed.
"Sit down, we'll be done in one second." Said Dib. He
was working on something she couldn't see behind the counter. She sat down at the end of the kitchen table. Zim came out balancing
two plates on his hands. He set one down in front of Gaz, and the other across from him. Gaz looked at the plate. It was a
waffle with whipped cream eyes, and a strawberry nose. It had a banana slice mouth. It was very cute.
Dib came out with
a gold-wrapped gift. He set it in front of Gaz. Gaz grinned.
"Ohhh, I get a present!" Dib and Zim grinned back.
We made it ourselves." She undid the gold bow, and tore through the gold wrapping. Tiny pieces fell to the ground feet away.
A gameslave! How did you make a gameslave?"
"Basic stuff, really. The main hard drive-" Dib glared at Zim.
question, Zim." Zim looked at the table.
"Oh. Um. If you have any problems or glitches or anything tell me and I'll fix
"I'm sure it'll be fine."
"What do you want to do today? Anything you want to do is our treat."
is what, like $20?" The two boys looked at each other mischievously.
"No. No limit." Gaz thought it wiser not to ask.
dunno. Coney Island." Gaz laughed at her own joke.
"Coney Island it is." Said Zim seriously.
"I was kidding. That would
be fun though. Ooooh, I know."
Zim moved silently through the fog, his weapon held ready. Strange noises echoed through
the strange environment. Garishly painted shapes loomed above him.
He saw a slight movement to one side, and whirled around,
releasing several shots in rapid succession. A bright light flared up, and he ran the other way. He sent off random shots
behind him as he ran. He hid behind a glowing orange wall. He looked around, at the ready.
He didn't see Dib. The boy snuck
up around the other side of the wall, his own weapon ready to fire. He jumped over the wall, a red beam emerging from his
weapon. It hit Zim directly in the chest. Zim shuddered.
"I'll get you back for that, Dib." Dib ran off.
counted to five, and then took off after Dib. His laser gun vibrated, signaling the end of the stop period. He saw Dib duck
behind a black-lit wall. He jumped around it, hitting Dib twice in the shoulder. He backed against the wall, covering his
back, and watched Dib, his gun at ready. Dib's target harness vibrated, but before he could fire, Zim shot him again, deadening
his gun. Dib, seeing no other choice, jumped the 4-foot wall, and disappeared into the fog. Zim grinned, but stopped when
he felt his harness vibrate. Where…?
He looked up into the second level, a maze of twisting passages, riddled with
dead ends and mirrors. Sections of the floor were grate, making it easy to catch victims from above.
Gaz grinned down at
him, giving him a little wave. She turned to fire at someone else, invisible to Zim. He aimed at her, and fired, but missed.
She turned back to him, but was hit with another laser from whoever she had just fired at. Zim took the opportunity to sheath
his gun and climb a nearby rope ladder. He was going after Gaz. He ran toward where she was, shooting at a few random kids
along the way. They ignored him as just another player. He came up onto the landing where he had last seen Gaz. He saw the
place where he had been hiding. Then he went off to look far Gaz again. He knew she'd be here, somewhere. That was her style.
Lure 'em in, shoot 'em.
Suddenly, the whole place seemed deserted. There was no one but him and Gaz. He saw something
move, and shot at it. The red beam reflected off the mirror and hit him. He rolled his eyes.
"Shot myself. Stupid rookie's
mistake. Ris-TEF!" He ended in an Irken curse as Gaz came from behind a mirror, weapon shooting of several red beams. Zim's
gun was effectively paralyzed. She grinned evilly. He was stuck in a dead end.
A huge yellow light blazed in a corner.
over." Said a computerized voice. Gaz sighed.
"Oooh, I had you trapped, too. Ah well. Wanna do another?"
walked toward the exit.
And the winner with the most hits is… Gamegurl!" Gaz jumped in the air, and clapped her
hands. The announcer handed her her score card.
"And the winner who got hit the least is… Invadr!" Zim grinned his
'I'm superior' smile, and took his card. Dib hadn't won anything this time, but he wasn't too upset. They added their score
cards to the growing pile.
"Are we doing another one?" asked Dib. Gaz and Zim shared a look.
"Yes." They said in unison.
No. Not again. They said that last one was their last one. They've been doing this all day! Every five minutes for the last
hour. I need a break. I do not get paid enough for this. They're coming again. They want three more tickets. Codenames? I
ask. They smile. Invadr. Gamegurl. Mothman. I know it. They know it. But they think, and debate. They ask me what I think.
They go through several different ones. And then they go with the same codenames they've had all day. Only another minute
until shift change.
Several hours later, the gaming was interrupted by the sudden, desperate need for food. Gaz wanted
to go to Bloaty's. Zim swallowed his horrible dislike for the place. He didn't eat any pizza though. And he yelled at a few
of the monster robots. They freaked him out.
Dib and Gaz had a pizza-eating contest.
Gaz won after eating ten pieces
of pizza. Zim just ate his lick-em-sticks. Plus a big bar of white chocolate. Yum. Chocolate.
After lunch, they were all
pretty bored with Laser Tag so they sought entertainment elsewhere. They walked around the city. Then they made the fatal
error of going into a 24/7. (JTHM fans know what I'm talking about.)
They bought three Brainfreezys. They sat outside and
drank them, watching the world turn. And then they got another Brainfreezy. And then just one more. Did I mention that Brainfreezys
are like 197% sugar? Yeah.
"LET'S RACE AGAIN!" Three streaks of color ran down the road, moving at a sugar-accelerated
pace. People ran for cover.
"I WIN I WIN I WINNNN!" Yelled Zim. He now knew the pleasures behind Gir's lifestyle. It was
"LET'S RACE AGAIN!" They ran back. Some random pedestrian threw a water balloon at Dib in an attempt to calm him
down. It didn't work.
"HE THREW BALLOON OF DOOM! GET HIM!!!" The poor helpless man ran away, and the three lunatics followed
him. They'd been chasing each other all morning, they could chase someone else.
1 chaos-filled hour later
eyes stared at the horror on the movie screen. Gaz wanted to sit in the front row. Which would have been fine if the movie
wasn't 'Vampire babysitter murderers 3-D.' Zim screamed. It was a scary movie.
Several rows behind them a man and a woman
kept talking to each other. The guy in front of them kept telling them to shut up. He was really mad.
Gaz stared at the
violence on the screen. She grinned. You could just see her brain taking notes. Zim stared too. He had never been to a movie
before. The glory of it astounded him. Dib stared for four seconds. Then he just watched the movie in brief snatches between
unbending his neck. Have you ever sat in the front? You have to keep your head at like a 90 degree angle.
Then there was
the sugar drop. They all fell asleep. They missed most of the movie.
"Thanks, guys. That was a lot of fun. I wish all
my birthdays were like this." Gaz grinned. The three friends said goodbye. Dib and Gaz walked down their pathway, and Zim
went into his glowing base.
Gaz wrote everything that had happened that day in her journal. Then she started on her new
The first two levels were pretty easy. The demonic squirrels were pretty easy to beat. The third level was harder.
In it the chipmunks of evil joined the squirrels. It took her ten minutes to beat that level. For the third level, that was
a long time.
Finally, after beating the fourth level an hour later, she had to go to bed. She saved the game, and dropped
1 week later.
Gaz stood under the awning at skool. Rain poured down all around her. She
didn't notice. She was engrossed in her game. She was trying to beat the last level. She had been trying to defeat the King
Squirrel for an entire day now. This was the hardest game she had ever played. It was great.
Dib and Zim came out of the
Skool loaded down with textbooks. They staggered under the weight. Then they started off into the rain. Zim hoped desperately
that the paste would hold for the trip home. He'd never make it to shelter with all these books.
"I was thinking we could
race 'em. Like on the moon or something. I think Tak's ship will do-" Dib cut off when he noticed Zim wasn't paying attention.
to Space Boy! Hey, Earth to Zim!" Zim shook his head, clearing it of whatever he had been thinking.
"Thinking about the
physics test tomorrow." He said. "I like physics. It's the same everywhere. It's the only thing I really get on this planet.
"Ah, you'll get used to it. You only don't get it cuz you missed everything up till 6th grade. You'll catch
up." Zim jumped.
"OW!" he looked at a thin column of steam coming from his forarm.
"Shoot. The paste is wearing off."
Fortunatly they were almost home. Zim shifted his book bag to cover the small hole. Another hole opened up. Then another.
"Argh. I have to go home. Wanna come over and do homework?"
"Yeah, Ok." Zim ran down his sidewalk and slammed the door.
He dropped his bookbag on the floor, where it made small cracks.
"GIR!" The robot jumped off the couch and stood at attention.
go get the healing salve." The robot ran off and returned with a small tube. Zim took it, and squeezed a little of the purple
liquid into the small burns the water had made.
They healed before his eyes.
(A/N I'm bored. I have no idea where this
is going. Pardon me if it's awful. It might be kinda jumpy. So sue me. You want a perfect story, you write it.)
was three seconds from beating the last level. Her eyes slitted in concentration. She gave off an aura, and people unconsciously
walked around her, not even noticing the girl.
"YES!! Oh, yes, yes YESSS!" She threw her arm in the air. Victory!
win" Said the gameslave tonelessly. Then the screen flashed. Words scrolled down. Gaz looked at the screen. This had never
happened when she won a game.
"Hi Gaz" It read "It's me, Zim. So you beat the game. Good job. I programmed this so I would
have no choice but to tell you this."
Gaz kept reading. Her eyes got bigger and bigger. So did her smile.
(I have no
idea what Zim would say. I stink at romantic stuff.)
"Warning." Said Zim's computer. It was back in his house now.
"Warning, No. 369."
Zim's eyes widened. 369. He thought it would take her a lot longer to beat the game.
"Uh, Dib? You
have to go. Now. Sorry. No. 369"
"What's that?" Dib asked, confused.
"It's very important. GOODBYE, Dib." Dib decided
he really didn't want to know.
Gaz had no idea why she wasn't stopping at her house. She was even less sure why she
was stopping at Zim's. She had no idea why she was walking down the path.
What am I doing? That was probably just Dib playing
a joke on us. He'll probably have a good laugh at us. Maybe it's ZIM playing a trick on ME. There's no way Zim likes me. He's
an alien, he was sent here to KILL us all. (Angsty, no?)
She knocked on his door, and it was a moment before he opened
"Hi, Gaz…" He said unsuredly.
Gaz was so confused at seeing Zim acting anything other than blindly superior
that she laughed. Zim looked crestfallen.
"You're not being superior." She said.
"I've never done this before. So…I
guess… just being human makes you better than me at this." He straightened up. "Not that that applies to anything else
Gaz laughed again. So the message was genuine.
"Rule number one, spaceboy. NEVER insult your date."
grinned a little, and opened the door. Gaz walked inside, and Zim closed the door behind her.
OK! That's all there
is. IF I get enough emails (5 ought to do it…HINT HINT) I will write more…or maybe a lot more. Look For more chapters
of NEW CLASS OF DOOM!
I am back to write MORE of my fanfic-y goodness. But this might not be so good, Cuz
I wrote the story about a month ago, and I kinda lost the story line. But for the faithful fans who REVEIWED, I will do my
Zim is gonna be REALLY OOC for this chapter. And Gaz is pretty OOC for the whole story, so that doesn’t matter.
do happy jig at: inu-youkai911, and my computer that plays music. I do meano frowny face at: … THE SKY!
PS. I learned how to use italics today….
Zim watched Gaz walk to the couch. Gir had
managed to cover the whole thing in chocolate, and he barely managed to save her from sitting in it. The robot himself was
nowhere to be found.
“I’m glad you beat the game.”
glad too. I just hope I can beat the last level.”
“I’m sure we can do it.” Zim blushed.
not exactly sure how this is supposed to work.” He admitted. Gaz rolled her eyes, smiling.
have DATES on your planet?”
“Ye… no, not really.”
“Well, technically the first date is
supposed to be just dinner and a movie.”
“We could do something else.”
“What do you think?”
“I don’t know.. This whole ‘date’ thing is YOUR
“Well, then, YOU tell me what you do on YOUR planet, Mr. Alien!” Gaz said testily,
folding her arms.
Zim looked at the floor, kicking his foot back and forth.
“We don’t have things like that
“Don’t you have any kind of romantic things there at all?”
there aren’t things like affection. There is only loyalty to the Tallest. And everything else is unnecessary.”
“Havn’t you ever loved anyone?”
Gaz started. She looked up, into the downcast purple
eyes. This Zim was so… different from the eccentric egomaniac she knew.
Yeah, but I’m different, too. She thought.
don’t we just see a movie?” Zim asked, almost pleading.
“Do you have a paper?”
Zim asked suspiciously.
“So we can look up the times of the movies, duh.”
“No… Can we look it
“I think so… Yeah.”
“I got it covered then.”
He turned toward the
kitchen, then turned back around.
“The interface is in the labs. Want to come?”
They walked into the kitchen. To Gaz’s surprise, there was a toilet there. Zim gestured to it, with a fake little bow.
“You’ve got to be kidding. I have to ride the TOILET?”
“Or we could take the fridge,
but that’s really not big enough.”
Gaz climbed into the toilet, which was, not
surprisingly, free of water. She pushed the flusher, and a slow spinning took her down about a floor. She found herself in
a dark purple room, not as big as she remembered. Of course, the last time she had been here, she was much smaller, and not
really paying attention.
Tubes and wires snaked across the ceiling, occasionally twitching as something went through them.
She could barely see beyond the first level, it was too dark. A sound like a finger running down a clean plate made her spin
around. Zim dropped out of a hole in the ceiling, landing on his feet and acting like this was totally normal.
over here.” He said, pointing, and walking in a random direction. Gaz wondered how he remembered. She would be lost
in a few seconds flat.
He led her through several passages and doorways to a small room. In the room was a basic computer.
thought it might be good to have one of these.” He said. “Just in case.”
He pushed the huge ‘on’
button. In a few seconds the screen flared to life. In a few seconds more, he was connected to the internet.
“Where do I go?” Zim asked.
“Here, let me-” Gaz moved to touch the mouse.
I mean, uh, I’m not sure if this room is reprogrammed yet, so you might not want to touch anything.”
is that supposed to mean?!” Zim sighed.
“The house is a tool designed for a soldier. And it is programmed as
so. It’s designed to… eliminate any and all intruders. The wiring has to be overhauled manually, a project I have
been working on, but his house is BIG. And I don’t know If I’ve got all the smaller parts done yet. So don’t
Gaz was speechless. To create a house that would protect its self…
“Where do I go, again?”
I think it’s Fandango”
Zim typed it in, and a website popped up instantly.
“Yeah, this is it. Hey,
look. It’s October 31. That rings a horrible bell for some reason… what is it…”
Halloween.” Said Gaz, remembering. Zim paled visibly.
“Irk, no. Not that…”
wrong with Halloween?”
remember, all the- Oh, wait. You don’t know about DIB’S HEAD!!!”
“It’s really big…”
cuz there’s an alternate dimension in there.”
“Riight… whatever you say. Look, Halloween’s
not so bad. There’s free candy!! What could be bad about that?”
“Mm… candy is good…”
You dress up scary and walk around getting free candy from people!”
“Candy is good…”
“It’s when you ask people for candy.”
but I will not ask. ZIM WILL DEMAND CANDY!!!!”
“You do that. We have to make costumes, though.”
a disguise. You wear it when you go trick-or-treating.” Zim gestured to his contacts and wig.
but less normal.”
“I can do that. What should we go as?”
“You know what would be funny? If I
went as in Irken, and you went as, like, a policeman or something.”
They laughed at the irony for several minutes,
even though it wasn’t really that funny. I have no idea why they were laughing so hard.
“That’s a good
idea.” Zim said when he finally stopped laughing.
“I can make you into an Irken, no problem. I don’t
think I can make an officer’s uniform, though. I think I have a hat somewhere, though.”
Zim navigated through a pile of boxes. Gaz opened one, and found it to be full of spare mechanical peices.
Another was full of (for some reason) doll parts.
“Ah, here we are.” Said Zim, dragging out something metallic
from behind a pile of crates.
It looked like a tall egg, on end. On the outside was a keypad, and a black seam ran around
“Now, a female Irken wears a slightly different uniform.” Zim was saying. “They also have
curled antennae, and, although they have red eyes, I think you would look better with purple.”
cool.” said Gaz.
“You also need green skin. This machine here can do that. It’s an artifical dye, which
works for about 24 hours. It doesn’t come of on your clothes, though.”
of clothes. I don’t have a female uniform here, but since uniforms basicly come out of little tubes, I can make one
in a few hours.”
“Which’ll give me time to put an officer’s costume together.” said Gaz.
you back here in two hours?"
“See you then.” Said Gaz.
"Okay. I pulled this together... I think it'll pass
in the dark." Gaz removed a blue shirt and black pants from her bag. In the red lighting of the lab they looked almost black.
A fake plastic badge made it look more realistic.
“I got that at an assembly. They gave them out like they think
we’re little kids. Ha.”
“I got the uniform ready. It was designed for me, but I think it’ll fit
you. Try not to get it wet, though. It dissolves.”
Zim and Gaz walked into different rooms and began to change. Gaz
found black gloves and boots. They were a little shiny. Black pants were only a little below her knees so that they wouldn’t
get caught in the boots. The shirt was a dark red. Three thin lines crossed it horizontally. There were short black sleeves
slit up the top. Under that, a pink and black striped sleeve went to a little below the elbow, disappearing into the gloves.
shirt was a little tight, but other than that, they all fit fine. It was designed for Zim, so that was a little surprising.
walked back into the main storage room to wait for Zim. A minute later, he came out. The costume really looked real.
Zim said. “This little machine here will basicly change skin color, eye color, pretty much whatever you want, for a
24-hour period. It uses dye, not makeup, so it won’t come off.”
Gaz nodded, and walked toward the egg. With
a pneumatic hiss, it opened, a little steam rising out. A little nervously, she stepped in, and is hissed shut behind her.
hit a few buttons on the console. A loading bar appeared. When it was done, the egg opened again. Zim gasped. Gaz looked exactly
like an Irken. She had light green skin, and solid purple eyes. Her purple hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail, and
two curled antennae protruded toward the back of her head. They were made of wire, but the effect was achieved.
a few more buttons, pre-programming the machine. As Gaz searched through as bag for a mirror, he stepped into the egg. Gaz
looked at herself in the mirror. She had to admit the green skin was cool. It was set off a lot by her purple hair and red
shirt. She liked the shirt, too. Maybe she’d find one to wear all the time.
She turned around just in time to see
Zim jump out of the egg, which was opening a fourth time. He looked exactly like a human. She wondered for a second why he
didn’t look like that ALL the time. Dib would never have suspected a thing.
He had dark, tanned skin, and blue eyes.
Not solid blue, like regular, human blue. His antennae had disappeared, covered by short brown hair.
“How do I look?”
He asked, a little self-consciously.
“Like… a human.”
“You look like an Irken.” Zim walked
up to her. “A beautiful Irken.” She looked up at him, smiling.
“You look pretty good, too.” Zim
leaned down, and Gaz realized he was going to kiss her. She smiled and leaned up. She met his lips, and kissed him, wrapping
her arms around him. He wrapped his arms around her, too. She had never kissed anyone before, but she still knew a good kisser.
And Zim was a good kisser.
“AWWWWWWW!!!! LOOKIT DAT!!”
Gaz squealed, jumping backwards. Her heart was
going a million miles an hour. And not just because of the sudden loud noise.
“GIR!” Zim was suddenly very
angry. “GIR! You get your ass down here NOW!”
“Aww,” Said Gir, dropping down off the ceiling. “You
said a bad woooooorrd…..”
“YES, I said a bad WORD! And I’m gonna say MORE if you don’t SCRAM!!
When I have someone over, you need to STAY in your ROOM!!”
“I don’t LIIIIIIKE my room.”
“KEN I HAVE TACOS!?!?!” Zim sighed, and covered his face with his hands.
“Yes. You can
have tacos. BUT, only in your room.”
“TACOOOOOOO!!!!” Gir’s feet burst into flame, and he flew
off to… god only KNOWS where Gir goes.
Zim turned back to Gaz, who’s heart was beginning to go the regular
“I’m sorry about that. He’s more trouble than he’s worth, but I’m kinda attached
“Yeah… I see why.” Said Gaz.
"Anyway... want to go now"
"It's still too early. But...
I know where there's a haunted house we can go to"
"Yeah. Let's just get out of the lab."
Gaz walked behind Zim as he
traced his way through the boxes and crates. Suddenly she noticed something.
"Zim, your PAK’s gone!"
not. I covered it up. It, uh, compresses a little, if I want it to." He looked at her closely. "And… you don’t
"Oh, yeah…" Gaz looked at the floor.
"Wait. I think I can fix this."
He disappeared into the red
darkness. Gaz suddenly felt the room expand around her. The darkness went on forever. She heard a quiet rustling, and Zim
reappeared. In his hand was what looked like a PAK, only it was silver with red spots.
"Ooooh, nifty." Said Gaz.
I made this once when I was bored. It’s fake more or less. You can use it if you want. But here’s the thing. It’s
equipped with spider legs and stuff, but it works through neural imputs."
"And… English would be?"
"If you put
it on, you’ll get all the stuff, but it’s gonna sting for a second when you put it on, because it connects, basicly,
to your brain."
"Tell me again why you have this?"
"Do you want it or no?"
"Uh… ah, what the hell." She
turned around. Zim put the silver machine on her back, and it glowed slightly. Gaz’s arm twitched slightly, and her
hand formed into a fist. She gritted her teeth. Zim was right. It stung. A LOT.
And then it was over, as suddenly as it
had started. Her back didn’t hurt anymore. It was just warm. Really warm. She put her hand on her forhead. It was normal
"Do you feel hot?" She asked.
"No, it’s the PAK. It can adjust your temperature." He grimaced and
thought of the ‘adventure’ they had had the week before. "To a certain extent."
"So, what about
the… what was it… haunted house?"
"Oh, yeah. Wait till you see it." The house in question was actually an
old barn, fixed up for the Halloween season. Colored lights played across the barn and surrounding forest, but did next to
nothing to illuminate it. Gaz grinned, liking the look of the actors winding their way through the line. Zim was trying to
hide it, but this was the scariest thing he’d ever seen in his life.
"We… we go in there?"
lots of fun. It’s really scary, there’s ghosts and things all over."
"What about all the keep out signs and
enter at your own risk?"
"Zim… those are FAKE. They really want you to come in."
"Yeah," said a scary voice behind
them. They whirled around, and came face-to-face with a ghoulish demon. Strips of his flesh hung off his face. "We want you
to come in… SO WE CAN EAT YOUR BRAINS!!!!!"
"AAAUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!" Screamed Zim. Gaz giggled.
This is all fake. These are just people in costumes. Evryone is in costumes on Halloween. You’ll barely find a regular
human anywhere around. C’mon. Let’s go get in line."
They got their tickets and went to stand in the line.
It was pretty short, they only had to wait about 15 minutes, but in that time they were approached by a werewolf, a vampire,
a ghoul, a ghost, something that had once been dead, and a stoner. The last one might or might not have been real.
they reached the black door to the barn, a creature with horns stepped out of the blackness, beconing to them.
to the house of HORROR!!" It screamed at them. "Please do not touch any of the creatures. They may decide to EAT YOU…
or, y’no, throw you out or something. Some parts of the floor (THAT ARE HAUNTED) may move without warning. Carry on."
He pointed off into the blackness. They crept off in a random direction for a few seconds. Gaz grabbed Zim’s arm, not
entirely out of fear. One arm out, Zim felt through the darkness. Sticky things hung from the ceiling: they felt like spider
webs. After a few feet, they were replaced by burlap bags, hanging from the ceiling.
"These bags feel kid of-" Bright
red lights flared up, and a scream was heard. The bags began to writhe and squirm. Screams were heard within them. Whatever
was in these bags, it was alive. A demon came out of nowhere, and, yelling at them to shut up, began to beat at the bags.
"Sorry, my… dinner, doesn’t want to be eaten. You’d be surprised what a fight IMPENDING DEATH can bring
out in a person." He ushered them on, into a thin, barely lit passageway. Every few feet, a hand would reach out and attempt
to grab them. More than one was splattered with blood. The floor suddenly bucked and jerked, and a chainsaw noise was heard.
Zim ran forward, trying to find some light. In the next room, Zim stopped. Gaz came up a foot behind him, looking at the empty
It comprised of a narrow passage between several bar cages. There would barely be room to move between the bars.
Gaz hooked back on to Zim’s arm, and, giggling, pushed him into the room. Still nothing burst loudly out to greet them.
Gaz kept giggling. Zim was completely unaware of how the humans could enjoy this horror. His soldiers’s sense was drumming
a tattoo on the back of his skull. Something was not right.
They had reached the middle of the room when the creatures
burst from the shadows. They filled the cages, arm, hands, reaching for the only two not imprisoned. Gaz shrieked, then realized
that they were not evil. They were scared. They didn’t have the same gory makeup of the other ghouls. They were dressed
like normal people. Some wore costumes, but they were ladybugs,and regular things, not ghosts.
"QUICK!" One shrieked.
"You have to run!! Out into the maze, hurry! BEFORE THEY FIND YOU!!"
"Before WHO finds us?" Shouted Zim, but they only
told him to run, hurry, hide. Find a way out, and fast! Zim ran out of the room, holding Gaz’s hand, pulling her behind
him. She didn’t scream. They were outside. Sort of. Ten-foot tall partitions surrounded them, in a maze.
isn’t fake. This isn’t how it works. Oh, god…"
"I told you this was a bad idea."
"Fine. We have to
get out of here."
"Uh… I say we go… left." They went left. This turned them to a short passage that turned
at a 90 degree angle… and then descended into the black Earth.
"Not that way."
"Geez, I’m almost expecting
the minotaur to come rushing up at us." Something in the dark passage moved. Two red eyes gleamed in the dark.
we go right." They ran back, turning right that time. This led to a forked path. They turned right again. They silently crept
along. Gaz stepped on a twig from a tree that wasn’t there, and the crack resonated around the maze. A face popped up
over the side of the path.
"Hey, you guys lost?"
"Yeah," Zim choked.
"Us too. Me and my two friends." The man
pulled himself over the wall, landing right in front of them. "My friends, STABBY AND GASH!!!" He pulled out two huge knives,
both wet and red, and rushed after them. Zim grabbed Gaz's hand, and they ran, pell-mell down random paths, minds set on doing
one thing: Not meeting the man’s two friends.
"I HATE Halloween." Zim said when they finally stopped. Gaz panted,
out of breath. They didn’t hear anyone coming. Which was probably good.
"We have…to get…out…of
this …maze." She said between breaths.
"The woman’s a genius." Said Zim sarcasticly. "Any ideas on how to
"We have to see where an exit is, and where the people in the maze are. But we’d have to be taller."
an answer, Zim unfolded the legs in his PAK, rising about four feet above the edge of the wall.
"Amazing. This thing is
huge. And very well populated, but he looks of it." Zim did a 360, looking all around. "There’s only one exit. And we’re
pretty far away from it. It looks like if we take this path," He pointed at one. Gaz was trying to work her PAK, it wasn’t
responding. "And go... left, left, right left right right, it should take us out." Gaz memorized the sequence. After all the
video game codes, she was a master.
"HEY! Look!" came a voice, echoing around them. "THERE’S ONE! GET HIM!!" Zim
dropped, ducking to the ground.
"And we have to go NOW!!" They ran down the path, Gaz pointing the way at each intersection.
"Left, left, right, left, left, right." She repeated quietly. "Wait. The exit should be right here. We went left, left,
right, left, left-"
"Left! We should have gone right there. No problem. We just have to go back."
"Oh, that could
be a problem." Said a voice behind them. They turned around slowly. A tall man with a chainsaw stood there. He revved it loudly.
"No one EVER gets out of the maze of DOOM!"
He laughed evilly. Which gave them time to run. Some more. They tried to keep
parallel to the outer wall. The further they ran, the darker and gloomier it get. Finally, Zim tripped over something and
"What was…" He started. The thing coughed.
"You… must escape." It said in a wheezing voice.
Zim looked, and saw that the ground was bloodstained around it. The thing coughed again.
"Quick… before they find
you, too." The thing pointed to the wall. Looking closely, Gaz found a tunnel, going under it.
"Zim, look, we can get
out!" she said joyfully.
"But what about him? We can’t just LEAVE this guy here!"
"Go…" He coughed a last
time, and his head slumped forward. His ragged breaths stopped.
"Come on, Zim! We can send someone back for him!"
Zim’s protesting was cut short by a sound coming closer. The sound of an engine revving. Gaz crawled through the hole,
Zim came through right after. It was less gloomy on the other side. In fact, it was almost cheery. Lights were set up all
around. A stall sold T-shirts with "I survived the Maze of Doom" on them.
"Wasn’t that great?" Gaz asked.
That guy just died, and… and… It was fake, wasn’t it?"
"YOU WERE SO SCARED!!" Gaz shrieked, laughing
her head off.
"Fine. I was scared. But if you ever tell ANYONE…" Zim trailed off. Gaz turned big, innocent purple
eyes up at him.
"Just… don’t tell."
"I won’t. Hey. It’s probably dark enough
for trick-or-treating now… If you’re not too scared."
"I’m not scared."
Merry Christmas everybody!
Or Hanukah! Or whatever you feel like celebrating this holiday season! Here’s my present to you! (Exept I obviously
don’t OWN invader Zim!! Hee hee)
Zim had never in his life been trick-or-treating. In fact, he normally spent
Halloween at home, targeting lasers and cowering in the lower labs. To Gaz, this was completely unacceptable.
to go trick-or-treating at some point in your life!" She exclaimed, pulling him toward a large development. "It’s taboo!"
"I still dunno. Last year, they say some kid got razor blades in their candy! That’s not good!"
an urban legend. They always say that."
"If you say so." Zim looked apprehensivly at the darkening sky. Werewolf howls
echoed throughout the streets.
"You remembered the bags?"
"Yeah." Zim reached into his PAK, pulling two pillowcases
out. They were black, with the Irken symbol in red on them.
"Just basic sacks. With one addition. Tiny interdimensional link at the bottom. These things’ll never fill up."
"You have all the cool stuff."
"I do. You go first."
"You’re still not scared are you?"
"I am not scared. But you go first."
"Fine. But you have to come with me." She dragged
him up to the first house. A group of little kids was just leaving. Gaz rang the doorbell. The door opened, and an old lady
stood there, with a big bag of candy.
"TRICK OR TREAT!" Shouted Gaz. She held out her empty bag. Zim cautiously held his
"Well, don’t you have a creative costume." The lady said, dumping candy into their bags.
They chorused together, before setting off for the next house. They ran straight across the darkened lawn. After the first
thirty houses, their bags were getting heavy. Most people had overloaded on candy this year, and were determined to get rid
of all of it. The trick-or-treaters didn’t mind.
House 779 was particularly interesting. A woman came to the door,
dressed in a bathrobe. She gave them some Q-tips and asked if they were friends of the strange little boy who lived there.
"Uh… no. Sorry." Muttered Zim. The next house was equally interesting. Zim rang the doorbell. It sounded like someone
screaming. The door opened a crack, and a young man peered out.
"Trick or treat!" Said Gaz nervously.
"Would you like
your eyes removed?"
"No thank you." Said Gaz. They scurried off. It was about an hour after that they saw Dib.
took them two whole seconds to decide to play a trick on him. After all, they hardly looked like themselves. They shook out
their bags until the candy had all filtered through the tiny links in the bottom, and then folded the ‘empty’
sacks into their paks. Zim retreated into a backyard, hiding in the dark shrubs. Gaz stood in plain view in front of the house,
waiting for Dib to come around to that house. Which he did.
Of all the days for another Irken
to show up. My Halloween is shot. This must have been what Zim’s 369 was. But then why isn’t he here?
up the Irken, she was undoubtably Irken, she even had purple eyes, and a Pak. She was standing on someone’s front yard,
looking disoriented. I approached her slowly, I didn’t know if she would bolt. To my surprise, she talked to me first.
"Zim? You’re Zim right?"
I have two options here. One, I can say no I’m not, but then she won’t
have any reason at all to trust me. Or, two, I can tell her I’m Zim. I can take her back to his base, he’ll be
there hiding, he always is on Halloween.
"Yes. Irken Zim."
"I’m Tix. The tallest sent me here to… uh…
I was banished."
"Tough. Here. Let’s go back to my base."
"Are the humans always dressed like this?"
thank goodness. It’s a holiday. We all dress up for one day." I started walking back to Zim’s house. I think it’s
only about two blocks. But man, this bag is getting heavy. I got a whole load this year. I’ll be eating candy till next
Tix followed behind me. She walks like Zim does. Or, like I am at the moment. I figure we both look pretty
ridiculous, walking along with our noses up in the air. But what the heck, it’s Halloween.
When we reached Zim’s
house, I could tell we had a problem. The windows were dark. It was obviously deserted. Where could Zim be on Halloween? Burying
my concern, I strutted up to the front door, flinging it open, and holding it for Tix. I closed it behind her, and the automatic
lights went on.
"Is this location secure? No Earth slugs can hear what we say?"
"It’s as secure as you can get.
It is the base of ZIM!"
"Good. We need to prepare the coming invasion."
Zim followed close behind Gaz and Dib.
They were both walking funny. After a few moments, he realized they were both attempting to imitate him. HA! The human skeletal
system was unable to replicate the Irken walk. He had studied it extensively.
But it was still most amusing to watch them
strutting along. Dib trying to be him, Gaz trying to be Irken. Why exactly Gaz had asked Dib if he was Zim, Zim didn’t
know. Even more confusing was why Dib had said yes.
And now they were heading back to the base. He hoped they didn’t
go into the labs without him… He could hear what they were saying, the result of an audio link between the two PAKs.
He listened with intrest as Gaz fabricated an amazing story of her own. "Good. We need to prepare the coming invasion."
"Don’t play stupid Zim. We’ve been working this out for months. The armada is coming."
of course. The armada. When is it estimated to arrive?"
"Zim, are you alright? The armada is coming tonite, Zim. We’ve
been through all of this. The soldiers won’t be noticed tonite, because of the holiday." Gaz took Dib’s hands,
her voice raising. She sounded truly joyful.
"They are already here, Zim! They are all over, beginning the task! As we
speak, the Earth monkeys are being extinguished! The Massive will come over the horizon in an hour. And then, the ships of
the armada. The Earth people will never have a chance."
"They’ll never have a chance. But… is there any way
the Armada can be sabotaged? The Earthenoids are smarter than they look."
"Impossible. You said it yourself. The only
one who even realized you were an alien was… what was it’s name? Bib."
"Yes. And he is wrapped
up in your web of deceit. After that glorious thing you pulled off about the Tallest. They were offended that you would even
consider the idea that they would turn their back on their greatest soldier."
A pang of sadness rang through Zim’s
heart. Gaz was an amazing storyteller. He himself almost believed that the armada was coming. Almost.
"Of course they
wouldn’t. After all, I am ZIM!"
"The only part is it’s sister. She knows you are Irken, too. After that stunt
you pulled with the crashing ship."
"She had to know. It was unavoidable."
"Ah, well. You have desposed of them, correct?"
Internally, Dib screamed. Zim wasn’t here. He was out looking for them. How had he been so stupid?
He had to save Gaz. If Zim hadn’t found her already. His green makeup covered the white color of his face. (He’s
Frankenstein. Did I mention that?)
"Then nothing left to do but wait. Wait for the glorious conquest of this dirt-ball.
Let’s go to the roof. We’ll watch for the hull of the Massive coming over the horizon, the flank ships delivering
their shots short behind. The beauty never gets old, does it?"
"It never does." Replied Dib. Then he bolted.
two objectives at this point. Number one, get out of Zim’s house. Two, find Gaz. This was not as simple as it sounds.
Because he had to ditch Tix. Then he would probably have to fight Zim, to get Gaz away from him.
Then he had to stop the
armada from coming. Stopping the Armada, which had conquered hundreds of worlds, was going to be a task.
Dib ran, leaving Gaz in the main room. Before he had made it to the door, I moved away from the window, moving out
to the street. I had no doubt that Dib would come straight to me. I had, after all, a pretty convincing costume.
as I predicted, Dib came crashing out of the front door, leaving it to slam closed behind him. He ran through the gap in the
gate, and straight to me.
"You gotta help me!" He screeched. "There’s an invasion coming!"
"Invasion?" I asked.
"Son, you’re crazy."
"I mean, uh, I can’t find my sister."
"You mean Gaz?"
"How did you know?" He
grabbed onto my shirt. "Do you know where she is?!?"
"Yes." I smiled evilly. Dib backed off, scared out of his mind. "The
invasion is here, Dib! HERE!"
insert maniacal laughter
"ZIM!" Dib’s eyes narrowed. He had figured out it was
me. I figured maybe it was time to end the prank. At least, I thought so a split second before Dib lost it.
I have nothing to lose. Absolutely nothing. I had made a stupid mistake. I had fallen for a ruse. And now it all
was coming out. The Earth was doomed. I was doomed. And this bastard had killed my sister.
"The invasion is here, Dib!
I ran into him, pushed him to the ground. If I couldn’t save Earth, I was at least taking down this Irken.
He wasn’t expecting an attack, and I pinned his arms easily. I held his arms down with my knees. And I started taking
One for my sister. One for my dad. And one for evryone else on Earth.
This could take a while. And I had all
the time in the world. After the first couple punches, his nose started to bleed. It was green.
was a bad idea. We never should have done this. I ran down the sidewalk. Dib was on top of Zim, beating the crap out of him.
"Dib, stop it!"
Yeah, like that was gonna work. Dib rounded on me. Zim groaned. There was blood all over his face.
"Why? Why should I stop? My planet, my sister, is dead, because of this bastard."
"No! Listen. It was a prank. A Halloween
prank! I’m Gaz! I was going as an Irken for Halloween!"
"Prove it. You’ve got green skin. You’ve got
one of their PAKs. You’ve got purple eyes. You’ve got antennae."
I reached up into my hair and pulled off
the wire antennae. I threw them at Dib. They bent as they hit the ground.
"I can’t change my eyes, or skin, because
I dyed them. It’ll wash out in about a day."
"I know what only you’ll know. What’s the secret code for
unlimited lives in super kicky fighter?"
"Up up down down Left right left right A B B A start. Now will you get off Zim?
God, I think you broke his nose." Dib got up, still looking suspiciously at me. I didn’t care. I knelt down next to
Zim. He was out cold, blood running down his face. I ran into the house, where Gir was watching us from the window. I looked
around the kitchen for a minute until I found a towel. I ran back outside. I’m starting to get really worried about
all this blood.
I will never ever ever ever play a trick on Dib again. Nothing good comes from
Wait. I’m thinking. Which means I must be conscious again. In theory.
The last thing I remember seeing was
Gaz coming out of the yard. I hope he didn’t go for Gaz after me. God, my nose hurts. I think there’s pressure
on it… Let’s try opening my eyes. No, wait. They are open. I see light.
I lifted up my arm, to see what was
covering my face. This apparently scared the crap out of Gaz. She told me what had happened, while I held the towel over my
nose. Most of the bleeding had stopped, but most is not all. Dib was nowhere to be found. Gaz said he ran off after she had
explained to him what was happening.
"We shouldn’t have done that." I said.
"No. Really. It
wasn’t all his fault. He’s protective. And we should have known that."
"I couldn’t help myself, with
the story. It gives you a rush, doesn’t it? You’ve conquered a whole planet. I almost fell for my own ruse. And
it gives you a rush."
"I fell for it too. I kept looking over my shoulder, looking for the Massive breaking the horizon."
I blew my nose, more blood came out. It’s stopped bleeding, I think. "They’re never coming, you know. The armada.
For years I hoped they would. I would wake up in the morning, and be sure that this is the day the Massive would come. But
they never did. And now I’m glad. Because no Planet has ever escaped the Armada."
I stood up and began to walk with
Gaz into the house. Gir saw me, and started screaming. I looked in the mirror in the bathroom. And I didn’t blame him.
Green blood caked my face. It was even splattered up into my fake hair. Dib can really hit. My nose didn’t look broken,
although it felt it. One of my eyes was blackened.
Or, technically, greened. The dark green on pink skin made an interesting
mix. But not so interesting that I’d like to see it again. Ever. I had some green bruises at random spots, and my lip
Yes, I will never piss Dib off again in my life. I turned on the faucet, and gel came through the faucet. It
used to be water, but I fixed that. I filled my hands up, and washed off the blood. Gaz looked pained.
"This is my fault.
I could have just acted confused. But nooo, I had to go for evil warlord. He’s never going to trust either of us again."
"It’s not your fault. It was my idea to play a trick on him. And you played the most convincing prank I have seen
in a long time. And with all the holographic projectors on Irk, I have seen a LOT."
"I think that was a compliment."
There was a frenzied banging on the door.
"Shit, Zim!!! What have you DONE!!??"
and I rushed to the door. Dib was there, fury etched across his face. Without taking his eyes off us, he gestured to the sky.
The Massive was there, in all it’s glory. Zim’s jaw dropped.
"I swear I didn’t know it was coming!"
"Yeah, like you and Gaz came up with that on impulse."
"We did!" I protested. "I made up the whole thing! Zim and
I were trick-or-treating when we saw you, and we decided to play a trick on you. Zim didn’t even know what I was going
"If you were trick-or-treating, at the same place I was, then what did house 777 give out?" "That was the weird
house. That guy asked us if we wanted our eyes removed."
"See, Dib. We do tell the truth."
me for not being trusting, but it seems AN ALIEN SPECIES IS HERE TO KILL US!"
"Speaking of that," Said Zim, "we should
get inside. The rest of the armada will be coming soon. And those lasers will flatten anything they hit."
Just as he said
it, the fleet flew over the horizon, multicolored beams flying out in every direction. Hundreds of them crissed and crossed,
effectively destroying everything in their path. Zim pushed me into the house, and Dib followed us. I jumped into the toilet,
and it started down. When I was at the bottom, I heard Zim or Dib coming down next. They came through the tube, and I saw
it was Dib.
"Dib, honestly, we didn’t know they were coming."
"Well, it doesn’t matter now, because we’re
all gonna die."
"He’s right." Said Zim, coming down the tube.
"Isn’t there something we can do?" I asked.
"No. There really isn’t. It’s the organic sweep."
"Organic… How many planets have they DONE this
Zim looked at the floor, not saying anything. Dib ventured out.
"I’m sorry about beating you up so bad."
"Yeah, I’m sorry about that too."
"I’m being serious. That was a really good prank. Too good. And I fell
for it a little too well. Did you know there’s a NasaPlace only a few blocks from here?" Zim didn’t react.
does that have to do with anything?" I asked.
"They have radar. Radar that can pick up anything in out atmosphere."
So they know the Irkens are here. Glorious. I can die happy, now."
"And when they see something that shouldn’t be
there, they start up an alarm. A LOUD alarm."
Wait. There wasn’t an alarm… "Great prank, guys, but mine
Zim stared at Dib. I stared at Dib. He smirked back at us. We all jumped for the elevator at the same second.
Zim got there first, and disappeared up the tube. I went right after him. Dib was last again.
(No particular POV)
Zim ran out onto the front yard, followed by Gaz, and shortly after, Dib. They stared at the ships flying over their heads,
but they had taken on a screensaver type quality. It was easy to see the same patterns fly overhead over and over. Soundlessly,
the massive floated off in the distance. Zim stepped past the fence, and the illusion disappeared. He stepped backwards, and
it reappeared. He turned to Dib.
"How did you do this? You had less than fifteen minutes!" Dib shrugged.
most recent holograph. He designed it for the police, to make convicts think that there’s more policemen surrounding
them than they thought. It was a pretty simple matter to reprogram it."
"But… these ships, the massive, how did
you know what they look like? I mean, how did you know Stickers always skim to the right?"
"Heh. I used to have a couple
bugs in your system. They’ve all been destroyed now, but I downloaded a lot of stuff through them." Gaz laughed.
and after that he paraded it all over. I used to hate you doing that."
"I think we’ve all been sufficiently tricked,
don’t you? I want to go inside. It’s cold out here."
Dib shut off the holograph, and they all tramped back
to the Membrane’s house.