Depressed at his latest failed attempt at word conquest, a teenage alien walks along a cold, grey
street.
Mad at the brainfreezy machine for being broken, and the (now deceased) clerk for not fixing it, a tall young
man shuffles to the bus stop.
The sky threatens to rain, dark clouds covering the sky, casting a gloom over the city.
The
alien sits on the bench, looking around for his archenemy. He sees no one, just another teenager, dressed in black, walking
his way. The boy sits on the bench. Five minutes go by, the bus is very late. "Stupid human transportation." Zim mutters. "Stupid
bus." Johnny says. They look at each other. "I’m Johnny." "If you really must know, I am ZIM! Future ruler
of your stinking planet." "You have an interesting attitude." "Silence. You do not interest ZIM and I now desire silence." Johnny
(Who is in a REALLY bad mood) reaches into one knee high boot. "And you can leave that there." "How did you know?" "Um…
It was a lucky guess, for I am a PERFECTLY NORMAL human stink-monkey." The first patters of rain come falling from the
sky. They hit Zim, and begin to sizzle. "AUGHH!!! IT BURNS!" "Perfectly normal?" "Shut your stinking head!" The
bus pulls up, and Zim runs for the cover. Johnny follows a little more calmly. Not exactly knowing why, he sits down across
from Zim. "Do you know the aliens who abducted my neighbor?" "I know of no aliens…" "Are you sure?" Johnny
picks up a half empty soda bottle from the seat next to him. Zim stares at it in fear. "Ok, maybe I do know some aliens…" "They
were about 6 feet tall, had floaty-thingies that they flew around on… There were just two of them." Zim’s eyes
got very big. "Zim knows of whom you speak. They are quite moronic. Do not judge all of us by their example." "You don’t
look like an alien." "I know." "Exept you’re green. But you’re not really tall." Zim smouldered at the
unintended insult. In fact, he had grown several feet in his time on Earth. He was now just a little under five feet. "So,
what’s your story?" "Story?" Zim eyed the annoying human with distain. "Yeah. All the aliens on earth have a story.
Like, you crash landed, and you’re trying to get home, or you’re a refugee hiding on an unknown planet or-" "ENOUGH!
Less babbling, you bore me. I am here to… observe… the humans." It was partly the truth. "I was hoping for
an invader." Zim started. Johnny noticed. "Ahhhh. So maybe there IS more to this…" "Nonsense." Zim said in
a less-than-convincing tone.
Johnny pondered for a minute. There was an alien here. On the bus. A potentially evil,
human hating alien. ‘Do we want to pass this up?’ ‘I don’t know, Mr. Eff.’ ‘He
could be telling the truth…’ ‘Not likely. Did you see how he jumped? Would he have done that otherwise?’ ‘Probly
not.’ ‘So…?’ Johnny got one of those looks only he gets. Zim noticed, and got a little worried. "What’re
you doing?" Johnny reached behind him into his backpack, pushed aside some knives, and found what he was looking for. A
small, slightly pliable sphere. He pulled it out, thumbed the button, and tossed it in the air. Instantly, thick, sleep-inducing
smoke (Which Johnny was immune to.) filled the bus. SWERVE!!!! It crashed into the nearest building, not doing much
damage. The thinning smoke poured out the windows. People gawked. A dark figure jumped out of the wreck, and took off.
Zim
came around rather slowly, never having been asleep before. He was aware of a large room, with only one door. Leaning on that
door was… he searched his mind for the human’s name… "Hello Zim." Johnny. That’s what it was. Johnny
walked across the room and grinned at him. "Since you seemed distracted on the bus, I’d thought I’d bring you
here. There’s very few distracting things here." "Where is here?" "This is my house. Actually, this is about a
mile below my house. There’s quite a few basements." "Sounds like my base." "Ooh. You have a base? Cool. I always
just thought aliens went back to the mothership. I don’t have much experience. There’s not that many aliens on
Earth, you know." "No. There aren’t. Just one, actually." Johnny sat on the floor in front of Zim. Zim realized
he was tied to a chair. He considered letting loose his spider legs, but decided that wouldn’t work. "What do you
want with me, human?" He spit the last word out, with obvious contempt. "Nuthin. I’m just kinda curious as to why
you’re REALLY on Earth." "I have told you-" "HEY!" A voice echoed out from another unseen room. "HEY! LEMME OUT!
YOU CAN’T KEEP-" It petered off. "Uh, excuse me for a minute." Johnny said. He ducked out of the room. "HEY! LET
US GO! LET US OUT OF THIS PLACE YOU CRAZY-GHKKK!" Johnny walked back into the room. A tiny smear of red now adorned his
cheek. "Sorry about that. Some of my other ‘guests’ are not so… polite." Zim looked at the human in
a new light. "You…you are turned against your own kind?" "Most of them." He looked sad for a moment, but the look
passed. "They’re really the ones that turned against me." "Then you shall help me -not that ZIM needs it- in the
CONQUERING OF THIS PLANET!" Zim said. Johnny pondered for a second. World conquest. Not an occupation he had ever imagined
himself undertaking. But maybe… "All right." "YES! Now, RELEASE ZIM! THIS INSTANT!" "Exept for one thing.
There’s one person who you can’t destroy." "Yes, yes, that’s very nice. Now release me." Johnny twisted
the screws on the chair, and the restraints released. "YES!" Zim lifted up on his spider legs, so he was a foot taller
than Johnny. "We shall rule this planet, you wait. We shall rule it yet." "About the one person…" "Yes, yes what
do you speak of?" "A girl named Devi. I’ll show her to you. You can’t destroy her." "Fine."
It took
them a whole year and a half to conquer the Earth. They did this by creating a Gas that would spread out and kill anyone who
inhaled it instantly. (I dunno. I am depressed from reading my own stuff for over an hour. Evrything sucks, and I hate the
world.) Johnny had to kidnap Devi and take her into Zim’s base, to keep her from inhaling the gas. How did he do
this? I dunno. Same way he kidnaps everyone else. I wonder how he does this, seriously.
Devi glared vehemently at Johnny.
Zim wasn’t around just at this moment. "You’re telling me I have to stay down here for a week" "Yes." "With
you." "Yes." "Because the rest of the Earth is being killed." "Yes." "By a poison created by you and another guy
named Zim." "Yes." "WHY?!?!" "Because the human race was abusing the Earth. The natural resources wouldn’t
last us another thousand years. Zim’s race inhabits a planet that has lived out it’s natural course. They need
somewhere to go. The Earth presents itself." "Why couldn’t they just live here WITH us?" "We persocute our OWN
kind, based on skin color, beliefs, and pretty much everything else. How do you think another SPECIES could live here in peace?" "PEACE!?!?!?!" "Look,
you and me are the only two humans left right now. I said I was sorry for trying to kill you. Can we please not fight?" "Fuck
you. Genocidal bastard." "I’m sorry you think that way. But there’s really not anything anyone can do about
it right now." "At least tell me the ANIMALS are safe from this toxin." "Of course." "I’m grateful to be alive.
But I still hate you." "Please. Devi?" Hsssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss "What is that? Johnny, what is that sound?" "I
don’t know…" The two humans suddenly dropped to the floor. Several floors up, Zim laughed. "Stupid human.
The Earth belongs to ZIM!!!" Grinning, he keyed in the code to call the Tallest.
These things just keep getting longer,
eh? I am tired. I shall sleep now.
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