Abortion

I'm not opposed to abortion. I'm not for it either. What I'm against is all the people who are trying to make it illegal. Look, you've got morals, you've got ethnics, that's really great, don't shove them at me, I don't want them. I mean, what if, say, the Jehovah's Witnesses gave up going door-to-door, and instead starting making petitions to force people to join their religion? That's the same thing these pro-life people are doing. I have an idea: How about we get a couple of these pro-lifers, and give them the babies?

That way, the girls who don't want to have babies won't have to, and the pro-lifers can have some of the problems they were trying to push onto others, instead pushed onto themselves?

This isn't to take all the pressure off these pregnant women. Don't want a kid? DON'T HAVE SEX, DUMBASS.

Kids are a pain in the ass. Abortions are a pain in the ass. That's a lot of pain for an hour of pleasure.

So how about this: If you get an abortion, you're automatically sterilized. This will make people think twice about getting them, and also get rid of 'repeat offenders.' Kind of like if we made the death penalty mandatory for everything worse than three parking tickets, that teen might think twice about sniffing that coke, right?

Or that little kid who doesn't have a mom anymore might reconsider, ten years alter, holding up that store.

Think of all the little kids who will be a lot safer because the sex offender wasn't released from prison, he was euthanised. Yes, euthanized. When dogs bite kids, they get killed, when men rape and murder kids, they get put away for ten years and released to do it again.

Something like 60% of crimes committed are committed by a repeat offender. If we just killed them, the crime rate would drop 60%!! I mean come on, why haven’t we done this yet?

Then again, there will always be people who, on their deathbeds, admit to having framed someone else, who got killed.

This part of the policy will be a secret, to encourage people to admit their crimes. If on their deathbed, someone admits to having committed a crime, we will let a psycho kill them, using nothing but a dull butter knife. At least they'll get punished.

Same goes for 'new evidence' convictions: butter knife.

This is good too: if you lie on the witnesses stand, you lose a finger for every word in the lie. Then move to toes. And then they start losing the really important stuff.

This may seem cruel and heartless, and it is really ( I am of the general opinion that most humans are lying scum, and have been proven right time and time again) but then again, you have to admit that it would work. Democracy is crap, you keep getting these assholes like that idiot who got a lawsuit so his daughter wouldn't say the pledge in school. This guy says he did it 'for his daughter.' I mean, yeah, what dad wouldn't want media freaks and death threats surrounding his daughter 24/7? The guy's just being responsible.

You are all idiots, until I say otherwise.

(6/28/05)